Mr & Mrs Smith

I've got just two seconds. She finally fell asleep (we like to get really upset when we're tired now) & I feel like I could use a nap as well. I took a shower & went to Costco today so I'm really accomplished. Last night felt like we reverted back to the golden days of 2 hours of sleep & alertness at night. She did not like her bassinet. But as I was rocking her in that bassinet at 2 AM, she stares straight at me & I'm thinking - miss flutter bug - fall asleep. Then, she gives me the cutest smile. So how can you hate being up at 2 AM then? I love her dearly, even though she drives me insane sometimes! However, to be honest... Outside of nursing her (only because you have to do it so often & it can be inconvenient especially if she's just pretending she's starving), I love every minute of it. I just can't be productive in her needy moments, but I even love those. Spoiled rotten. No, I don't need to eat, sleep or take a shower. I j...

Ms Alexis is one month old & Mrs Kayla is a  quarter   of   a century .  We made it. I seriously love this cute face. She was so good for a solid 10 minute photoshoot.   This was my two week picture - we are related I think? But she definitely has more hair. I think we have gotten 10xs better at nursing. However, nursing in public with a baby that chokes is still a problem so we don't. I hope she gets better soon. I try to tell her to be calm, but she doesn't listen to me. I just hate that it makes her fussy & gets messy. We reached my goal of 4 hours of straight sleep last night. 9:30 bedtime. 1:30 wake up time. 20 minute feed & back to bed for 2.5 hours. 40 minute feed/back to sleep time then another 2 hours of rest. That's kinda how things roll. But I'd much rather wake up twice than three times. & I think I'll expect to hear the birds wake up for a long time.  Speaking of, it's bedtime. Best Birthda...

Well, not everything can go according to plan I suppose. We want to make good choices, but sometimes things don't work out and maybe that's the best answer. We went to sign a lease on a new place this morning. Remember that long-term apartment hunt in Winston-Salem, due to the current apartment, which has a hint of smoke in the air? Rent is also going up so we wanted change. Our lease is up on the 30th and we have more than half of the apartment packed up, the Uhaul set, etc... WELL , we're watching a BBC TV series starring Mr Darcy instead. We took a risk when we found out they still haven't rented our apartment out. We're hoping to negotiate another month here in the morning. Unfortunately, sucking up the current issues, but it's best trust us . I hope to give you more details later. I just love the chaos of life. so on to ramblings about Lexi . . . Our one month old (I'll try & take pictures tomorrow) is not handling the afternoons as...

Praise the day she likes the NUK pacifier . . . just when I thought all hope was lost and that she'd never learn how to suck. Mrs Erin, you win. We all appreciate your gift. Although still on a 2 hour schedule, we've figured out the nights&days. Maybe.  And nursing is, well you know, still nursing. Let's just say, it gives us gas. And that's about all I have time for today, folks. Let's love life. We move apartments this weekend. Maybe . Stress of the mind. It's why Mr Smith holds out on telling me things sometimes. Mrs Anxiety, at your service. Cheers to 3 week photos. We finally made it back to church, now as a family of three. smiling at daddy

I love mothers . Those who stayed at home with their children. Those who worked to give their kids a better life. I respect those who breastfed for any amount of time. Those who never gave up on doing their best for their children. Those who stayed up late in the night. Those who changed every kind of diaper. Those who read to their kids and rocked them back to sleep. Those who sang with their children and played with their children. Those who cried for their children & laughed with their children. Those who prayed for their children. I love mothers who sacrificed for their children. I love mothers who loved their children. Mothers are strong. Some of the strongest people I know. Being a first-time mother, I now understand this a little bit better. I have a wonderful mother. I have a wonderful grandmother. They love us with everything they have. Mr Smith bought me a Kindle a week ago as a surprise gift. He wanted me to have something to distract myself when ...

i look like ive just battled a mountain lion. through  the spilled milk, tears, exhaustion & lack of personal care i look like a big fat mess who still hasnt eaten today so my breaking point is soon. that is what i said yesterday now add more tears & feelings of inadequacy and i bring you to today. the title could easily be "why didn't you tell me" or " how come no one talks about this" maybe since my pregnancy & labor were good (as good as it can get), the postpartum part hit me harder. I get why those affected keep it to themselves. I don't like admitting what I struggle with. & who wants to be so negative when it comes to such a positive blessing. the baby. you dreamed of that moment. you've prayed she'd be healthy and you've pictured her in your mind. now she's here and that first week is almost a blur. you do understand what disturbed sleep means. people told you about that. and you...

we started a new phase. it's called hold me and ill sleep longer than 10 minutes.  it's also called farting is sooo dramatic. you never thought you'd love the burping & farting sounds of a cute little girl. but holy crap drama if you have to wait for it. it's awesome when she's nursing at the time and doesn't let go. hello grumpy bronco. i think it's normal. that's a fun game to play. "what's normal" wearing yesterday's clothes with spit up. you havent eaten breakfast, but you've nursed twice already. dang it i forgot about the pumped milk still sitting in the bedroom. baby's head in armpit. toes are the new fingers. calls go to voicemail. you are excited to get 3 hours of sleep in a row. you hear every sound when they sleep trying to determine how much longer you have. you've also decided that the bassinet can go in the hallway instead of right next to you. turns out you can still hear them whe...

they are sleeping together again. she is on his shoulder. it's 8:25am and I guess I'm used to running on 2 hour sleep intervals with a 1 hour awaken stupor. the instant she fussed I felt my boobs stock up. oh it's that pressure that actually makes me want to nurse. however, my little chubs is getting better about not hurting mama. I just have to watch for the head bucks and stay calm when she chokes herself which naturally makes me all but calm. this first week really does kinda suck & outside of slight improvement, the second week probably will to. but it's not like I'm going anywhere. not yet. and the 2 hour interval I mentioned, that's a lucky day. I must say though, I think I got an easy first baby. if she isn't hungry or poopy, she is typically pretty happy. I just think she's too hungry but I'd rather have that issue than the opposite. at our 5 day weigh in she was 9.5lbs which is 1lb heavier than when we left the hospital 3 days befor...