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Let's Be Honest

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Sometimes I want to ball up (with my down comforter) in a cave. I hate those mornings where you're not quite ready to be awake and take on the day. You're stuck in your own depressed head and each thought somehow makes you more guilty and self-deprecating. I felt emotionally and mentally depleted.  And of course I called myself pathetic for not being stronger than this. I know I'm stronger than this! I know I can be a grateful stay-at-home-mom who finds value in helping my daughter grow, building my talents and making my home a place of happiness and refuge. I know I can love this work. I know I can be confident in knowing I am on the right path and doing good things. 

I think it's when I devalue my work, whatever it is, and I decide it's so easy I can do it on my own. Dare I say it, but I think Heavenly Father doesn't need to deal with me today. I act as if He thinks like the world - which doesn't recognize me and doesn't care - who thinks I have nothing to complain about. How is this girl (me) struggling? She is weak. Let her work it out alone. She needs to get her act together and no one can do it but her.

False. Tell Satan to go the bleep away.

Heavenly Father is ALWAYS loving us. He is ALWAYS caring about us. even little me. To him, I'm significant. I am his divine daughter. It is me who pushes him away. It is me who lets go. It is me who ignores his words of inspiration or his guiding call. It is me who can ALWAYS come back. Sometimes it takes more effort than we feel we can muster. But we have to get up. We have to choose to get up. We have to ignore the negative and have our eyes focused forward. We have to just try, even just a little. The load has already been carried, so let it go. It is no good to try and do it alone. We can't be perfect alone. We need to Him. And that's more than okay.

Botanical Gardens, DC; unedited - just beautiful

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