It's Not A Fight. I'm Just Right. - Mr Smith

I just now realized why I have been craving cupcakes the last two days . . .

perhaps juvenile & simple, but that is me.

Marriage 101 - Contention is of the devil

Mr Smith & I don't have real, adult fights. Or at least I didn't think so but maybe most of adults bicker about the simplest things too. So, maybe we are "normal" adults, or like Mr Smith prefers to say "I'm the only normal person I know." So here are our most recent "normal" fights. (because if people ever ask I forgot what they were over & just assume we're perfect) In the order that I remember them . . .

#1 - the unfinished kitchen table that has taken 2+ months to finish (previous blog post dedicated). we bought a high chair that attaches to the kitchen table a month ago. genius. so when Mr Smith wants to relax after work I become a ticking time bomb because I'm just waiting and waiting for something I want & when I suggest I do the next step "well, it's not set up yet" "well, I need to do the first coat" and YADA. he's a perfectionist but a procrastinator major when it's not his priority. I'm not patient when things don't go right the first time. I turn into the monster who just wants to throw paint on it & drag it upstairs.

#2 - As if we actually treated the budget like a budget and not a "I wonder how over we are spreadsheet" we knew spending was pretty much done the week before the month end. But life is life & part of it is always excused away & if we need it, we need it RIGHT!? Any way, in an effort to save gas money, Mr Smith went to Aldi on his way home from work. "What-the-freak are these!?!" "What does stick to my simple, Thanksgiving only list mean?!?" And "where the flip is the sour cream?" - "Oh I saw whipped cream too & in my head thought oh we don't need that nasty stuff. cream is cream" *pulling mental trigger* We argued over wafers. Well, I got on a soapbox & shouted in my megaphone about how idiotic it was to buy this nasty, gross wafer treat that had nothing to do with banana pudding when the majority of my list was devoted to Thanksgiving only. "well, you buy retarded stuff all the time, i thought they were gross too, but how was I supposed to know." I googled Nilla wafers. He now knows. I'll go to the expensive grocery next door tomorrow & get Nilla wafers & sour cream. And for the record he bought more ice cream & chocolate cake that is not good for the body nor budget approved. 

#3 - Why do we have to watch THIS TV show. "why are you still watching this?! it can't be any more retarded" - me. "you have to watch each episode to understand what happens later" - Mr Smith "who the freak cares!?!? you are wasting your life" YADA YADA YADA you get the gist. My shows never fall under this.

#4 - Redbox. Did you use a free code? YOU DID NOT USE A FREE CODE, AGAIN?! Or YOU PAID FULL PRICE?!?!! the most expensive one is NOT always the best one! 

#5 Mrs Smith talking "blah blah blah"

Mr Smith "asks a question that I answered above"

Mrs Smith "do you really never listen to me!?"

Mr Smith "you mumble"

Mrs Smith "I was not mumbling then!"

#6 "Kayla - the gas is still on!!!!!!!" 

"uh oh. turn it off"

"you're going to burn the house down" 

"I'm sorry I'm a horrible person; I'll never cook again"

There are more. I'll try and remember the real simple ones for next time. Those are the best because it's mostly just "why aren't you doing it the way I would do it" crap.  I've been trying to catch myself & step back. 

And then sometimes I just want him to listen. I don't want his solution that will solve all my life problems. I know they are simple, but let me think I'm complicated for a second. I just want someone else besides a 7 month old to talk to. The person who knows me best. It's just like we throw up on them when they walk in the door. I'm still in my pjs even if I've tried to disguise them with a sweatshirt. Sometimes I just need a fight to feel alive. A fight that ends in retarded laughter.

There is a nag train. I pretty much start 95% of the verbal drama. I threaten various places to punch him. He gets Lexi to pull my hair. I try to punch him & he laughs using Lexi as a shield. He doesn't think I could actually hurt him, but I hold back. He is kind of an eye for an eye guy... even if you're a girl. So it stops. I make him give Lexi a bath because "I did it last time." He gets ice cream & I roll my eyes. He's cold so we snuggle. I smile at one of his stupid shows and it makes him happy. We go to bed & he lays on my side to warm it up while I brush my teeth. He lets me touch him with my cold feet. We say I love you & sweet dreams. Cause although everything matters. Love matters most.

And even better than that is this little nugget of truth . . .

Mr Smith found an excerpt from a conference & thought of me (so sweet)

I'll share: "Be Meek & Lowly of Heart"

Another important step to becoming meek is learning how to control our temper. Because the natural man dwells within each one of us and because we live in a world full of pressure, controlling our temper may become one of the challenges in our lives. Think for a few seconds how you react when someone does not comply with your desires the moment you want them to. What about when people disagree with your ideas, even though you are absolutely sure that they represent the proper solution to a problem? What is your response when someone offends you, critiques your efforts, or is simply unkind because he or she is in a bad mood? At these moments and in other difficult situations, we must learn to control our temper and convey our feelings with patience and gentle persuasion. This is most important within our homes and within our relationships with our eternal companions.