Whatever it takes

So I got the membranes stripped. It's kinda just like a more intense cervix check. A grueling 45 seconds for sure, but we women get desperate. And we'll take anything that could encourage things along. She said if I were to get induced, I wouldn't need the pill that thins you out. She thinks I have a good chance of my water breaking as I am 90% effaced. But I also don't want to depend on petocin to get the ball rolling. You're moving so much, just move out! Come on contractions . . . any minute now. I have a Thursday morning appointment for the NST test, which if anything I'll take seeing you in black & white BUT COLOR WOULD BE SO MUCH BETTER.

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To Live is to Change

I love change. I love variety. I love mixing things up just because I can. It's helpful, but it's kind of a double edged sword. I'm terrible at consistency, even though Clifton Strengthfinder told me that was my #5 strength (I think they meant something closer to wanting things fair & equitable which isn't wrong). I not only move furniture in & out of my life, or make sure we don't eat the same thing too often... but I love that I can give my kids a flexible education. God knew this is something I would love & has allowed for it even when it comes with significant sacrifices (as many good things do). This has been a beautiful way to grow me over the last 4 years, and I definitely missed it, but I also started to doubt ever doing it again, which felt odd. I found myself questioning why I wanted to take the harder course. I had a little break with just E & M at home, but now B is back too, so I'm giving up some me time (I was never good at it any ...

Our Baby Story - Alexis

Alexis Jane Smith 04.27.13 - 5:16PM 8lbs 15oz - 22.5 inches brown hair, undetermined (blue) eyes NB clothes are too tight You hate diaper changes You love being swaddled You are a piranha for food Your skin is perfect You sleep better with noises You came out sucking on your fingers But luckily you're not a scratcher Basically, we think you're perfect. First day at home photo Dear Lexi, We couldn't handle holding you inside my stomach for another minute. We made an appointment when the contractions never came. Things were changing, but you were still 7 days late. Maybe we were eager parents, but now that we have you in our arms, we understand why, really understand. You're amazing . By the time we showed up at your 6 AM hospital appointment to be induced, I was already 3.5 cm dilated & 90% effaced & having mild contractions. So mild I thought I might have had high pain tolerance because I didn't feel th...

And so it begins, again

At what point do you ... 1. Keep holding on waiting for inspiration to come 2. Try something different 3. Let go & walk away I'd say most of us are usually somewhere in between #1 & #2, but there are occasional moments where I find myself locked into another Jane Austin film with some oreos & milk ignoring reality all together. Today, I'm trying to rise above some level of complacency & clear my mind at your expense. Mr Smith & I had a good run of it, but since blogs became obsolete in 2017 while Instragram chained us all to algorithms, I had no audience nor desire to write in this world. But times change, after it murders our souls, and alas we are famished for an authentic keyboard with less distractions again. So, let's catch up. They say it comes in threes... Since our job change in 2017, we experienced three more moves, three additional job changes (that don't necessarily align with the moves), and three additional children. 2018-2022 were ver...

Mr & Mrs Smith

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