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Dead Sexy

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Thank heavens it's Friday. 
Mr Smith & I love Fridays.

I've really been trying to pay more attention to details and focus more at work. It has just been so hard this last month! Mary, I read your post at 12 weeks and I wonder if there is something to missing the details! I'm not sure when pregnancy brain kicks in, but I buy that it's affecting me. 
Who the crap knows what is normal is anymore.


I crave things I've never craved before: ramon, mac-n-cheese, spaghettos, bagels!? Crap - that's what I crave. And I can't stand two of my favorite things: guacamole and hummus. I'm having gag reflexes just thinking about it. I end up gagging until I burp up air, calm myself down, or worse case (that always makes me feel better) throw up. 

My biggest fear/worry these days is where I'll get my next snack. It really is not something to trifle with. Mr Smith has learned how important it is to me. Apparently I turn into the big baby who is having a baby. And I still hate walking into the kitchen, it's just the smell of it that's uninviting. I just want the food to appear on my plate, and I'll try to finish eating before my body falls to sleep.

So that's life. When I pictured pregnancy I pictured women twirling in cute sundresses barefoot, quilting beautiful blankets and taking yoga. Everything is peachy once you get past a few days of toilet hunchedness. What a joke. I'm sure there is something sexy to pregnancy, but that label is not found where I'm sitting. I love love love coming home and putting on my designated pregnancy pants, t-shirt, and wallering all over the couch and then my bed. Dead sexy.

Like you mentioned, Mary, I too feel super thin/normal/ish in the mornings, but after dinner I feel like a freakin elephant bloated to the moon. I can't sleep on my stomach anymore. I thought I was lucky to have small boobs because I loved sleeping on my stomach. Now I'm propped up by feather pillows and rolling over takes so much more strength.  

And that's pregnancy. I get super excited sometimes to remember that I'm pregnant. I don't have this huge reminder yet.  It's still all unreal and April will always seem too far away, but like people are telling me, I will enjoy the sleep while I have it. I will enjoy the last 6 months of just being with my husband and being selfish in our time. And I will enjoy the mac-n-cheese.

It's time for a snack.
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  1. Mary Jones05 October, 2012

    Ha, I rarely make a post! Yeah, they were doing studies on pregnant women and thier memories at BYU. I almost participated, but I didnt have enough time in my schedule. I wonder if that study has been published yet!

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